Wanted- New Family (Bring on the Teen Angst)

   Something has gone catastrophically wrong when you cannot physically stand your family. I am now at that point. But perhaps that is giving them too much credit. Surely they can't be responsible for my involuntary bulimia, immense hair loss, drastically increased insomnia, and being in a constant state of panic. They are not the sole cause of my mental and physical breakdown, they are just a big big part of it. Uncharacteristically, my mother is trying her best. She is not really telling what she thinks either way but is telling me to be prepared and toughen up for the shit storm that I will be receiving from the rest of my family. Speaking of which, my father was the first one to jump on this bandwagon. Since day one he was against me coming to American University. We couldn't afford it, it was out of my league and so on and so on. Being the rebel that I am, I was hell bent on proving him wrong. I couldn't. I even told him this...Sort of. Our phone call consisted of him telling me why I was wrong for wanting to transfer to Framingham State University. My (possibly over dramatic) response was "jesus christ dad, I am telling you that you were right all along. What more do you want from me?" One of his main points was that my priorities are messed up. My top priority is to get an affordable education and not become a drug dealer. I think they are pretty well organized. Also, he said that kids at FSU are being forced to stay at hotels because they don't have dorm rooms. I don't know if this is true or not but the fact that he is trying to scare me into agreeing with him.
         The only family I have in DC thinks I am  making a mistake too. First is my uncle Joe. 1) He graduated college a good thirty years ago. 2) He is a professional blogger. Enough said.The other person is my cousin Jimmy. He and I have come from two different families and this is something I recognized from a very young age. To put it nicely, Jimmy has grown up with a silver spoon in his mouth. His father and my mother, though siblings, are extremely different. His father is an extremely successful entrepreneur and businessman and republican. To be frank, he is a republican party's wet dream. This of course was all transferred to Jimmy, who was an undergraduate at Boston College, is now getting a masters degree at Georgetown and has a job with Wells Fargo in the spring when he graduates. Oh and my favorite conversation I had with him a few days ago surrounded the Occupy Wall Street movement. According to Jimbo over here, the american people deserve to be in this situation because they should have been educated enough to understand what they were signing x years ago. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. I had a total Jon Stewart moment. So hopefully now it is clear for you to see how he can't understand where I am coming from.
      I guess I have run out of steam as far as this rant. My application is in, test scores paid for, and transcript is sent. There is nothing they can do about it. No matter what I do I will end up broke or broken.

My Roommate is a Witch

    I don't mean this is in the offensive sense. I am literally saying my roommate has magic powers. She gets everything she wants!!This has happened on numerous occasions. At first she was just a self-proclaimed daddy's girl but this is so much more than that. If there is a class she does not want to have, within the next two hours her professor will send an email cancelling for the day. When it was one of our friend's birthday Julia wanted us all to go out to dinner. Kristina was really tired and didn't really want to go but I made her. She complained the entire train ride there. We were almost there and Julia realized that she had left her phone back at the Tenleytown metro stop. We all rushed back as fast as possible. Unfortunately it was not there. After that Julia just wanted to go home. Kristina was ecstatic that she had gotten her way....and she wasn't exactly tactful about it. But the real kicker happened last night. She had told this guy a week ago that she would go out with him last night. Well, all day she complained and complained and kept wanting to cancel. I told her she couldn't cancel on him a few hours before. TEN MINUTES before they are supposed to leave, her phone rings. His wallet was stolen and the police found it so he had to claim it...and of course reschedule. But here is the best part- she told him she wasn't feeling that great and they should try again next weekend. She then decides to go out anyway. She sees him on the shuttle bus and he offers to go out after and she said she was running to CVS for her cold. I think my lying abilities have rubbed off on her and her fucking impeccable luck and she is unstoppable. I hate her.

$53,000 and this is what I get

Dear American University,
     I have a few bones to pick with you, in fact, it resembles the skeleton of a dwarf. I can wholeheartedly promise you that my roommate and I do have a master plan in the works to steal everyone's mail and make money from the possible cash inside. Please remember that I am paying $50,000 just to breathe this air so do not be fooled into thinking we could actually turn a profit. I am sorry for not returning the letter, and I am very sorry for losing it. But please keep in mind that there are kids starving in Africa, monks burning in Tibet and soldiers dying in Iraq. This is not the end of the world. Not even close. I would also like to thank you for the thrilling meeting that I had today with my academic advisor. Again, I am paying this woman to...oh I don't know...academically advise me. Not to have me wait twenty minutes past my appointment time (because it is not like I have class or studying or a social life or anything) look at my file for a good milisecond and basically tell me that I am fucked. I will remember that you did not do your job and do what you could to keep me at the university.                                                                                             So thank you American University for making leaving your ass a little bit easier.

What A Week

       After two months of being here, college has finally hit me. And it is not just a friendly punch in the arm. No, this was a Mohammed Ali on steroids, down for the count, lights out, you're not going to remember your name when you wake up sucker punch. A lot of shit happened, good, bad and downright FML-worthy. I'll try to look on the bright side first.Well...this is a lot harder than I thought....something good must have happened....Maybe it will come to me later. As for the bad...there was plenty of it. I fought with 3 people that mean a lot to me. While most of the problems have been resolved, I am still stressed out by them. So to
LB- I'm sorry, we both acted immaturely. Let's put this behind us.
ME- Again, I'm sorry. I haven't known you that long so it is amazing what a great friend you are. I won't forget that ever again. Thanks for being one of the few reliable men in my life
And last but not least ZB- I am not sorry. I will not apologize to you. You are acting like a fucking idiot. You are finally getting somewhere in life but you can't help but to screw yourself over. But you are not taking me down with you. You know I can't leave now, you bastard.
Not to mention I hit a new low in the form of procrastination this week. I started to 10 page papers the night before they were both due. I need to stop slacking and letting my personal life interfere with my academics. Gah!!!! I honestly have never felt so stupid as being here. At the same time though I love it. I don't want to leave. But I do.
I need sleep....now.....Good night y'all